Much to the surprise of everyone, my boss resigned two weeks ago. We're all still getting used to the idea of the moody workaholic not being around. I've never known anyone to work as hard as him and to get so little recognition for it.
I learnt early in my professioal career that if you're going to put in the extra hours (which rarely happens in Media Sales!), then your boss and boss' boss have to know about it. If you so happen to be working very early or late, then there must be some pressing email which needs urgent attention of your boss at these hours. Gone are the days where you can alert your PC to send the email at a certain time, so now your boss will know you are working at the hours the email arrives.
We used to refer to this method of brown nosing as "remote browning".
Anyhoo, given the imminent departure of my boss, you'd a thunk he would chill the fug out and become more chirpsome...but nnoOOooo. So far this week he has been so chilly that I've constantly got erect nipples - so much so, i've resorted to cellotaping them down.
Gobby, nosey tosser colleague has moved on to another magazine thank god! I still do not understand how he got promoted as he hardly did any work during his time working on my product. Saying that, whilst he was, his ability to brown nose had fine tuned to perfection. He surreptitiously worked on building a little step ladder which aided his ability to climb further up the crack of my boss with laces barely visible.
Also, his timing of dropping colleagues in the shits was absolutely inspiring, impeccable knack of giving the impression he actually does work was flawless - but at the end of the day, the numbers speaketh louder than the cockney crap which farts out of his gob...which is why everyone on our product CANNOT understand how this wideboy got where he did.
He's a cockney wide boy and sounds like he should be selling potatoes at a market stall, however his public school boy act is the most hilarious thing ever. Clearly he is uncomfortable with who he is, deeply insecure hence the sly underhandedness fuckwitted behaviour.
Anyhoo, that aside, given that my boss is leaving there have been some changes here. It will be tres interesting to see how things develop over the coming months and incredibly exciting opportunities lie ahead. I have already started plantation of the seeds which will grow into a BIG APPLE in a year or so ;-) ...
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Blagging it
Journey to work was interesting...the strong smell of puke and dogshit reeked my head into a dizzy state. I was also thinking how cool it would be to have "Von" in my name somewhere to punctuate it; Regina Von Filangee. It's got this dark lady ring to it. Anyhoo, it's something I will work on when i renew my passport. If my parents ask, I will just say I was made a "Lady" and this is my new title - my father will be ever so proud to know his daughter has a title in her name.
Just before lunch today, my boss plonked the FT in front of me and strongly advised I attend a conference and pose as a journalist! Ok, I will rock up to this conference in my leather Matrix coat, summer sandals and my name badge reading Regina Von Filangee - Senior Writer, asking questions about economic and financial transformation in the European Banking sector! We can all tell from my blog that this is clearly not my area of speciality!
What if I am asked to interview the CEO of a company again? Lsst time it happened, my response was; "Sorry, I have to chair a discussion on the Asian equity capital markets..honestly I would love to have otherwise". Don't have a clue what it meant, i had just read it in a magazine that morning.
Right, off to make a cuppa and seriously scheme how to get out of this conference thingy!
more pressing issues later.
Just before lunch today, my boss plonked the FT in front of me and strongly advised I attend a conference and pose as a journalist! Ok, I will rock up to this conference in my leather Matrix coat, summer sandals and my name badge reading Regina Von Filangee - Senior Writer, asking questions about economic and financial transformation in the European Banking sector! We can all tell from my blog that this is clearly not my area of speciality!
What if I am asked to interview the CEO of a company again? Lsst time it happened, my response was; "Sorry, I have to chair a discussion on the Asian equity capital markets..honestly I would love to have otherwise". Don't have a clue what it meant, i had just read it in a magazine that morning.
Right, off to make a cuppa and seriously scheme how to get out of this conference thingy!
more pressing issues later.
Friday, October 13, 2006
Too da loo
I've finally had to succumb and use the restrooms on an airplane. Well they are not restrooms; they are plain and simple bogs. I HATE using toilets on planes.
Firstly having to share with men is grossly disgusting and why on earth doesn't the separate men’s n lady’s loos apply at 30,000 feet? The cubicles are so small, they should be called pubicles and over 200 people use the facilities within the ten hours and you just don't see anyone cleaning the toilets in that timeframe.
My last trip I managed to hold it for twelve hours each way; my world record is sixteen hours, but I’m quite sure I’ve done my bladder some perma damage after that marathon holding session.
This time I had to go and was pleasantly surprised at my discovery of the disposable seat cover...fantastic! I only piled three bits of tracing paper to cover up the seat. It sure beats squatting - not the most enjoyable exercise, especially when you hit turbulence and before you know it you're pissing all over the walls.
There's simply nothing in comparison to sitting on the throne at home.
Still incredibly disappointed with the soap dispensers though; stingy, tight and cheapass comes to mind. You press it ten times and barely enough comes out to wash your pinkie.
To this day, I still do not understand why people do not lock the door when they go to the loo on the plane. It just doesn't add up. You walk in, there's a sign which says "please lock the door" and the lights do not come on unless you lock the door, so you are reminded to lock the door.
Next time someone tuts at me for opening a door which says "vacant" whilst they got their crusty pants around their ankles, I'm going to make a pubic announcement on the airplane to embarrass them further!
Firstly having to share with men is grossly disgusting and why on earth doesn't the separate men’s n lady’s loos apply at 30,000 feet? The cubicles are so small, they should be called pubicles and over 200 people use the facilities within the ten hours and you just don't see anyone cleaning the toilets in that timeframe.
My last trip I managed to hold it for twelve hours each way; my world record is sixteen hours, but I’m quite sure I’ve done my bladder some perma damage after that marathon holding session.
This time I had to go and was pleasantly surprised at my discovery of the disposable seat cover...fantastic! I only piled three bits of tracing paper to cover up the seat. It sure beats squatting - not the most enjoyable exercise, especially when you hit turbulence and before you know it you're pissing all over the walls.
There's simply nothing in comparison to sitting on the throne at home.
Still incredibly disappointed with the soap dispensers though; stingy, tight and cheapass comes to mind. You press it ten times and barely enough comes out to wash your pinkie.
To this day, I still do not understand why people do not lock the door when they go to the loo on the plane. It just doesn't add up. You walk in, there's a sign which says "please lock the door" and the lights do not come on unless you lock the door, so you are reminded to lock the door.
Next time someone tuts at me for opening a door which says "vacant" whilst they got their crusty pants around their ankles, I'm going to make a pubic announcement on the airplane to embarrass them further!
Seriously?
Questions on US immigration card, followed by answers I would like to have submitted!
Do you have communicable disease; physical or mental?
Well my therapist says i'm speschul - does that count?
Have you ever been arrested or convicted for an offense or crime, or are you seeking entry to engage in criminal or immoral activities?
Yes i was arrested for shop lifting sweets when I was 4 and a half and am seeking to gain entry to shop lift sweets from candy stores along the west coast. I will also open a lesbian prostitute brothel.
Have you ever been or are you involved in espionage or sabotage or terrorist activities or genocide between 1933-1945, and involved in anyway in persecutions associated with nazi germany?
No, I was not born then but I know someone who was. In fact they helped me pack my suitcases whilst i left it unattended and they put sharp objects in my hand luggage.
Have you ever detained or retained or witheld custody of a child from US citizens granted custody of the child?
Course not, I hate kids and they should be locked up at the back of the aeroplane.
Have you ever asserted immunity from persecution?
Yes, I have claimed immaculate conception with Bush being my bastard son.
Do you have communicable disease; physical or mental?
Well my therapist says i'm speschul - does that count?
Have you ever been arrested or convicted for an offense or crime, or are you seeking entry to engage in criminal or immoral activities?
Yes i was arrested for shop lifting sweets when I was 4 and a half and am seeking to gain entry to shop lift sweets from candy stores along the west coast. I will also open a lesbian prostitute brothel.
Have you ever been or are you involved in espionage or sabotage or terrorist activities or genocide between 1933-1945, and involved in anyway in persecutions associated with nazi germany?
No, I was not born then but I know someone who was. In fact they helped me pack my suitcases whilst i left it unattended and they put sharp objects in my hand luggage.
Have you ever detained or retained or witheld custody of a child from US citizens granted custody of the child?
Course not, I hate kids and they should be locked up at the back of the aeroplane.
Have you ever asserted immunity from persecution?
Yes, I have claimed immaculate conception with Bush being my bastard son.
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